I think i may have made another of my spectacular mistakes.

Although i've waited for matt for a year and a half its just not what i imagined it to be. We hardly see each other and when we do it's not comfortable. Most couples can see each other and go straight up and hug the other one. Maybe it's just coz we only just started but it shouldn't be this hard. It doesn't help that while we seem so distant, a lad at school Liam who i liked since year 7 suddenly started bein all flirty and chatty to me again. We'd drifted apart over the last 6 months but it was just so great to be with him again today. && it was comfy and we cud be flirty and it was just nice not to have all the pressure. ..|</3|..

Why Wen Im Sposd To Be All Luvd Up Can I Not Stop Thinkin Bout Ryan?! All Day && Night I Thought Bout Him && Then For The First Time In Months Yoo Come Online. It's Mad. It Was Fate To Start With && Fate Again Today? It's All Slightly Confusing. Wat Makes It Worse When Im Goin Thru This Mini Nightmare In My Head Is That Ma Boyf Hu Is Sposd To Be Bothered Cant Even Text Me On Valentines Day. Okay He's In Wales But He Has His Fone && A Computer. How Hard Is It? When I Need Yoo Most Ur Not There But By Total Coincidence The Guy I Cant Stop Think Bout Is. <3

..Matt <3 I Can Be Yor Hero Baby!

 So even though im with the guy i wanted for year and a half and who i was head over heels for, why can't i get ryan outta ma head. I have matt who is perfect for me in everyway and who i've known for almost 2 years. I've known ryan 6 months after meetin him on holiday last year and spending two weeks with him. I don't get it. Im not gonna chuck matt by all means but...he's not ryan. Ryan is just. Well we had something-special. and don't get me wrong with matt it is special, btu it just doesn't seem to compare. I wanted matt foreva yet two weeks with another boy and i can't stop thinkin bout him. It's been 6 months since i met ryan and i've thought about him everyday && every night. It's so bad that sometimes when matt's holdin me i shut my eyes and pretend it's ryan. But then i feel guilty and try to snap out of it. I can't stop myself. <3 x

Love...lucky

 I want all the peeps out ther 2 know that i have met and actual real guy hu is sweet, caring, good-lookin and is genuine! I cannot believe how lucky 2 am to have found him! Its amazing! After knowing him only 2 weeks on holiday he bought me a bracelet! I din't know guys could care like that?! I was speechless! It was jus so amazin! I onisly cannot believe my luck at finding someone so right and perfect for me. We spent my last night together and it was unbelievable...so we didn't do anything except hold each other n chat (n kiss!) but it didn't mater. He sed that he couldn't find anything to say but to me i couldn't of cared less becoz i was jus so happy 2 be with him. He was worth 2 weeks of waitin for one night together. So anyone who thinks that there isnt anyone out ther for them, you are wrong. It might take time but u will find them...and whne you do you'll know that they're right for you and you'll be so happy..like you've never known yourself to be before. Keep searching and you'll find it. Look around at whats close to you to...it might just be staring you in the face....

ThoseDreadedWords

Today im feeling pretty low...ive just had 2 hear the nasty words that are "lets just be friends". Nobody deserves to hear those words unless they have done something terrible. Guys just do not get how much they hurt us sometimes...i guess this means another "getting over it" session which means i end up putting like 3 gazillion stone on through comfort eating chocolate! oh deary me...ah wellas i say plenty more frogs in the pond i guess...shame i wanted that one though!

YaY

Omg me n james sorta got off with each other!! omg it was so amazing..it wasnt planned! We wer walkin through the maths corridor n it jus sorta happened!! gawd im so happyful!! yayayayyaya have u all had a good day?

LoversAtWar

 Woah! Wat a fun day! I've been in a really good mood! And it's friday so yay! Right first off --girlie sarah lou on here...he didn't txt me back but im okay with it...trying not 2 think bout it a lot! Right anyway...there may be another guy on the cards! James! He's really nice to me but i don't get him? Apparently he likes me n has told several people he does n he's all huggy n that but as soon as this other girl coes over (Chyna) he completely ignores me?!!! i dont get it...?

HypeR

hey 2 all girlies out ther 2nyt!! Im really hyper 2day evn tho 2day was reasonably borin!! Didn't see matt walkin hime 2day so sorta gutted but i'll live! Anthony sed heya 2 me 2day so tht made me smile! I hope he's okay! His gf broke up with him widout tellin him n was gettin her new bf 2 go round n hit him so he definately knew!! James was sweet 2! Still lurvin matt tho!! hehe! eny one got any problemos?? comment if ya have n i'll see if i can help!!

IWillNeverBeWithYou

 Aint rote in ages! Why do guys lead you on and get you all hyped up then jus drop you like they don't care? I was gettin on so well with this guy n then a week later hewas tellin me bout all of ma mates he fancied n how much he thought they were all fit without regard 2 my feelings...i feel so used. Do any guys actually give a .... how us girls feel??